Fallon Fox, the first openly transgender athlete in MMA ( mixed martial arts ) history, came out publicly March 5, 2013. She has been fighting in and out of the cage, and still continues her battle while also fighting off the grips of Father Time. She is a mother of one teenage daughter and now dating Amy Pierson. Fox has been living in the Chicago areanow, the northwest suburbsfor eight years, coming to the Windy City to escape gender issues within her family. Fox spoke exclusively with Windy City Times' reporter Ross Forman to discuss her battles in and out of the cage, her long-term goals to aid the LGBT community, and more.
Photo gallery at the link: www.windycitymediagroup.com/gay/lesbian/news/photospreadthumbs.php .
Fallon Fox was at a crowded sports bar in the Chicago area on Dec. 28, 2013, among a throng of vocal, dedicated Ultimate Fighting Championship ( UFC ) fans, many anxiously waiting for that Saturday night's women's bantamweight championship bout when Ronda Rousey faced archrival Miesha Tate in the co-main event of UFC 168, held at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas.
The bout was a culmination of The Ultimate Fighter ( TUF ) 18, a show that showcased Rousey's competitive naturethe same Rousey who, in a 2013 interview with the New York Post, stated that Fox has "an advantage" and that she does not "think it's fair" that Fox fights against females.
After Rousey triumphed, a group of 10 or 15 friends debated the women's side of UFC, debating who might knock Rousey off her throne.
Someone said Fox, and she heard it.
So Fox slowly made her way over the group, ultimately surprising all.
"So, do you think I could beat Ronda Rousey?" she asked with a smile on her face.
The group was shocked. They said they saw her that night at the bar, but none were certain it was Fox the fighter.
Cell phones were quickly converted into camera mode.
She stayed with the group for about five minutes.
"Months ago, I probably wouldn't have don't that," Fox said.
Truly, her life is transitioning.
Fox won her first three MMA fights, but dropped her most recent, on Oct. 12, 2013, to Ashlee Evans-Smith in Coral Gables, Fla.
"I think my record is pretty good, even though I lost my last fight. Hey, every fighter loses at times; it's just something I have to come back from in my next fight," said Fox, who will fight three or four times annually, and has no next fight scheduled, yet. "I am very hard on myself for things I did wrong [in every fight], even if I win the fight. You can never have a perfect fight. I'm very hard on myself, even for the smallest things. But I always learn from my mistakes."
Fox said her MMA career should continue for another few years. But five years from now, she added, "I don't know [if I still will be fighting then], maybe not so much."
She is battling Father Time, not just her in-ring foes and out-of-ring hatersof which there have been plenty. UFC color commentator Joe Rogan, for instance, was strongly opposed to Fox. Also, Matt Mitrione has said Fox was "still a man." Mitrione also called her an "embarrassment" and stated that Fox is a "lying, sick, sociopathic, disgusting freak."
"I will never please the haters, and I really don't care about them; I'll never reach them," Fox said. "The ones who love me, I give them all the love back. I stick to them; they are my support. It's the ones who are in the middle of the road, on the fence, who I am trying to reach. They might understand the reality and truth behind the situation.
"It's painful when those people who are really, really hateful, but I'm starting to get used to that; I'm starting to get a thicker skin."
Some haters have been converted, she said, adding that some have even emailed her to admit they have changed.
Not many have changed to now support Fox, probably a dozen, she said.
"I think I am changing minds of people who have never even had to think about the subject. One of the reasons trans people are discriminated against and hated so much, even outside of sports, is because … we're silenced. A lot of us transition and go on with our lives, and live in silence, and not too many people get to hear our stories. I think it's important that we're able to voice our stories, our experiences. This is a very important time for us to get out there, in every sectorto just be yourself."
That's why Fox said her post-fighting career will be within the LGBT communitysomehow, in some capacity.
"For me, the coming-out of Fallon Fox was the bravest thing anyone in sports did in 2013," said Cyd Zeigler, co-founder of Outsports.com . "We've made so many great strides for LGBT athletes, but MMA is still deeply transphobic. Fallon came out in a sport that many believe is specially designed to rightfully exclude her and everyone like her. She has had to bear the brunt of brutal attacks from fans and other fighters. She has had her personal life dissected by state boxing commissions. Through it all, she's been a fighter. Fallon is my hero, and I hope I can meet hatred and ignorance as bravely as she has."
Fox is, without question, a trailblazer, which she said is "a lot of responsibility."
"There are a lot of people, especially young people, who say that I am their hero, their role model, so I feel like I have to live up to that expectation. It's been pretty surreal," Fox said. "I was pretty sure before I came out that something like this likely would happen, but being the first, and so [prominent] in the media, is something that I don't think anyone can prepare themselves for that."
Fox has been living in the Chicago area for about the past eight years, coming to the Windy City to "escape my situation in Toledo, Ohio." Fox was born in Toledo, has served in the U.S. military, and has one daughter, 17, who calls Fox "Mom."
Her family was not accepting of her personal issues, so she left for Chicagoat the urging of a straight male friend she knew from her military stint.
"[It] was a hostile environment as far as family goes, and I just needed to get away and start over, so I came hereand Chicago has been a very nurturing place for me," Fox said. "I suppose I didn't know what to expect when I came here; I didn't know too much about Chicago. But it's been nice, really good to be here.
"But I don't like the cold so much. If it could be warm here year-round, I would be in paradise."
Fox said some family members have "started to come around" over the past couple of years and be more accepting. But still, her closest family member is her younger brother.
"I fill [the void] with other types of family, such as my LGBT family, or friends, or my partner, Amy," Fox said.
She has been dating Amy Pierson, 28, since last summer, though the two met about five or six years ago through a friend.
"For me, I think it's really important to have someone to come home to, to talk to," Fox said. "There's a lot I have to deal with, so to just have that emotional support and love from my partner is very important."
Fox, who was profiled in GQ Magazine in late 2013, said she is "pretty satisfied" on the personal front, "though there is a lot more that I want to do."
Her daughter, an honors student, is doing "very, very well in school. I have no complaints from her at all," said the proud Fox.
"I realize the position that I'm inand I want to capitalize on it. I want to help and do as much as I can to help the LGBT community, especially trans people. The T needs to be brought up; it is behind the LG and B. We're way behind," Fox said. "It's kind of surreal to see my life story in a big, major magazine or on TV."
Trans athlete Chris Mosier, a Chicago native who now lives in New York and runs transathlete.com, said Fox is a "role model" for so many under the LGBT rainbow, not just within the T world.
"She's changing athletics and our culture in general by making trans people a part of the conversation in sports," Mosier said. "As a fighter, she clearly has a tough job, but I think Fallon endures more outside of the ring than she does [while] fighting. The comments she has had to deal with have been atrocious, and have shown us as much about society's ignorance of transgender people as they have about the strength of Fallon's character. Fallon is an absolute warrior.
"As a trans woman, Fallon faces a lot more discrimination than I do as a trans man. When I came out as a trans male triathlete, people said, 'Good luck trying to compete against the men,' and basically ignored me. But Fallon is assumed to have advantages competing as a female, despite her having virtually no male hormones, mostly because people already have their minds made up about her competing. The facts are out thereshe doesn't have advantages over other female fighters, and she is not unbeatable. If she wins, it's because she trained hard and was the better fighter, not because she's trans.
"Fallon is relentless both inside the ring and in her everyday life. I have been so impressed by her commitment to be her true self in the face of adversity. She truly epitomizes the word 'fighter.'"
Fox will be spotlighted this summer with the release of a documentary Game Face, an inspiring film by producer/director Michiel Thomas about the coming-out process of professional and college athletes.
"It's going to be an awesome documentary about the challenges that LGBT people face in sports, in coming out," Fox said. "There are a lot of things in the documentary that people are going to see that they just don't know about yet; I think it's going to blow people's minds."
Such as?
Fox would not say.
"For me, this [documentary] is very important because I want people to understand what we go through, how hard it is for us LGBT athletes to come out, the reasons we don't come out [immediately], and then what happens when we do come out."
The film will show Fox as an everyday person, not just a trans fighter.
"This [film] will be eye-opening for a lot of people, [showing me] at training [sessions], behind the scenes at fights, with my daughter, and more," Fox said.
"I'm stoked for the film. I can't wait until it's done and released."
More from Fallon Fox:
On a gay athlete in one of the big four pro male team sports ( baseball, basketball, football and hockey ): "I'm still waiting for that one [active] LGBT athlete to have the guts to say that he is gay, and come out. I think, when an athlete comes out from one of the top four sports, the public will be very accepting," she said. "Sure, Jason Collins caught some flack, a little, when he came out, but, for the most part, people were very accepting. There have to be gay athletes in the NFL, the NBA, [as well as the NHL and Major League Baseball]. I think it's going to happen, soon."
Fox enjoys going to Andersonville, and spoke favorably about the now-closed bar T's. "I used to hang out at T's Bar a lot before it closed; that was my spot," she said. "I have to find a new [favorite]."
She attended the 2013 New York City Pride Parade via GLAAD. She has been to the Chicago Pride Parade "plenty of times," she said, but never been in it, yet. "I would love to be in the Chicago Pride Parade."
More Chicago: "I love Market Days."
She is, admittedly, a "horrible cook," and said she enjoys playing video games, especially the Mass Effect series.