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  WINDY CITY TIMES

Snyde and Sneak
by Tracy Baim
1999-09-01

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What´s going on with Coconuts, the music chain? First, the Diversey and Broadway store, with thousands of gay folks streaming past every day, is refusing to take gay papers. Now, the Coconuts in Naperville has said they are throwing out the Outlines, so stop delivering. We hope our readers will ask about their policies¯and ask them to take gay papers.

President Clinton will be the special guest speaker at the Empire State Pride Agenda´s 8th Fall Dinner Oct. 7 in Manhattan. Sen. Charles Schumer will also address the lesbigay crowd.

Sunday, Sept. 5, is the 6th Annual Festival of Potluck Foods picnic with desserts and live entertainment. Prepare & share your favorite family dish for eight from 1-6 p.m. at the Hans Christian Anderson Center, 824 N. Hayes, Oak Park, ( 708 ) 524-8387.

Michael Vore of Firetrap Press had put on hold his website while completing his new book, The Raft. Now he says he hopes to have a new book by the late gay columnist Jon-Henri Damski by the end of the year.

That´s entertainment

Unabridged Books presents gay writer Dennis Hensley Wed., Sept., 8, reading from his book Misadventures in the ( 213 ) . They also host gay writer Louis Bayard Thursday, Sept. 9, reading from and signing Fool´s Errand. Both 7:30 p.m., 3251 N. Broadway, ( 773 ) 883-9119.

Mr. Showbiz reports that Sandra Bernhard and Janeane Garofalo will guest on HBO´s Sopranos mafia show. They will kiss when they play a motorcycle-ridin´ lesbian couple, Showbiz said. The show´s new season doesn´t start until January.

This Sunday on Linc´s on Showtime, Linc´s lesbian daughter returns¯and has a crush on Linc´s girlfriend.

ABC´s Politically Incorrect Aug. 24 included openly gay writer/director Kevin Williamson, Saturday Night Live actor Chris Kattan, radio talk show host Holly McClure, and actress Shelley Long. Host Bill Maher asked Kevin about being cover boy on The Advocate¯Chris asked why he was on the cover, and Kevin said it´s cuz he´s gay ( not that they don´t put straights on the cover all the time ) . Bill gets into it with Chris¯saying his character Mango is gay. Chris was unsure if he stepped on toes by asking Kevin, but Holly assured him it was a simple question. Bill then wondered why GLAAD and others are complaining that 17 gay characters on TV shows this fall isn´t enough¯when it´s more than all minoritites combined. GLAAD believes the gays are token and mascots for shows, with only one main character ( Will ) being gay. Kevin says his Dawson´s Creek and Wasteland "both feature lead gay characters who have full fleshed-out story lines." Holly and others complained they´re all white¯and Holly wondered why the character´s sexuality was not fully played out. Kevin defended the character´s development¯and said on the 13th he becomes quarterback. Holly says a lot of kids are making a "choice" to be gay now because of these shows.

Sept. 2 on VH1´s Celebrity Karaoke Cabaret, Lea DeLaria sings Joe Cocker´s "Feeling Alright." ... Cher: Live in Concert included video clips from her "Elvis" impersonation video. She warned gay guys not to fall in love, since she makes a cute guy.

Mixed Media

The Australian newspaper reports that tours highlighting gay sex lives of animals at Perth Zoo are being promoted as a feature of this year´s West Australian Lesbian and Gay Pride Festival¯ to the embarrassment of the zoo´s management. Hey, how about gay tours at Lincoln Park and Brookfield zoos. Nan ... you´d be perfect to be leading the troupes!

The Aug. 29 San Francisco Chronicle had a wonderfully detailed report about the impact of a custody decision of 1991¯and what happened after the lawyers went home. The birth mother got full custody of the kids, despite their bond with their other mom. The tragedy took an even worse turn when the birth mother was killed in a car crash, and her 13-year-old son asked authorities to call his other mom. Without intense pressure, the son might have gone to foster care. Micki Graham is now Micah´s legal guardian. The National Center for Lesbian Rights estimates that the 1991 case Nancy S. vs. Michele G. has blocked hundreds of lesbians from getting visitation.

Closing down a bit of herstory

Prairie Moon Books, an anchor of the Northwest suburban lesbian and feminist community for more than five years, closed down last Sunday. They auctioned off books and other items¯but do intend to operate a virtual store on the web, www.prairiemoonbooks.com, featuring books for girls and women. Call ( 847 ) 342-9608.

Dixie Chicks stir it up!

Dixie Chicks, hits at the recent Lilith Fair, including fir their song "Goodbye Earl" on their new CD, are making the best of the controversy around the song, which is about revenge dealt a wife beater. US99, at the request of record execs, polled listeners about whether to air the song'% said no, but it wasn´t like the station was likely to air it much anyway, so this way they got some p.r. out of it. The song ends with two women going off together ¯could be gay, maybe not. Judge for yourself:

Mary Anne and Wanda were the best of friends

All through their high school days

Both members of the 4H Club

Both active in the FFA

After graduation Mary Anne went out lookin­ for a bright new world

Wanda looked all around this town

and all she found was Earl

Well it wasn´t two weeks

after she got married that

Wanda started gettin´ abused

She put on dark glasses and long sleeved blouses

And make-up to cover the bruise

Well she finally got the nerve to file for divorce

She let the law take it from there

But Earl walked right through that restraining order

And put her in intensive care

Right away Mary Anne flew in from Atlanta

On a red eye midnight flight

She held Wanda´s hand as they

worked out a plan

And it didn´t take ´em long to decide

That Earl had to die

Goodbye Earl

Those black­eyed peas

They tasted all right to me Earl

You´re feelin´ weak

Why don´t you lay down

and sleep Earl

Ain´t it dark

Wrapped up in that tarp Earl

The cops came by to bring Earl in

They searched the house

high and low

Then they tipped their hats

and said "thank you ladies

if you hear from him let us know"

Well the weeks went by and

Spring turned to Summer

And Summer faded into Fall

And it turns out he was a missing person who nobody missed at all

So the girls bought some land

and a roadside stand

Out on Highway 109

They sell Tennessee ham

and strawberry jam

And they don´t

lose any sleep at night ´cause

Earl had to die

Goodbye Earl

We need a break

Let´s go out to the lake Earl

We´ll pack a lunch

And stuff you in the trunk Earl

Well is that all right

Good Let´s go for a ride

Earl Hey

( The Dixie Chicks do not advocate premeditated murder, but love getting even. )


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