Robert "Rob" Paradise, a longtime and popular softball player and coach in the Chicago Metropolitan Sports Association (CMSA), died Aug. 18—a day after the final game of the 2014 Open Division Sunday Softball League season.
He was a local high school math teacher who lived in Uptown, and a diehard Chicago Bears fan. He is originally from Hammond, Indiana.
Paradise was 53.
"Never have I seen someone put so much effort into making so many things happen—and I'm not just talking about softball teams and softball tournaments," said teammate Steve Kasperski. "I'm talking about Texas Hold 'Em games, fundraisers, barbecues and more. I think Rob just liked to have gatherings; he would do the work and fund it to make them happen."
Paradise played in the Gay Softball World Series several times, and his 2011 World Series team in Chicago finished in fifth place.
"We always go to Milwaukee for a [Labor Day weekend] tournament and play in the Senior Cup here in Chicago [the following weekend], and Rob always puts those teams together. It's going to be hard to play those [tournaments] without him there," Kasperski said. "I know he would want us to play those, not back out."
Paradise's 2014 team, the Center on Halsted Crush, played in the C1 division. The team and another CMSA team, Replay Jox (of the D1 division), held its second-annual Jocks in Drag fundraiser Aug. 23 at the Center On Halsted.
Kasperski said Paradise was "his typical self" Aug. 17 during the softball playoffs, "but you knew something [was wrong]; he wasn't feeling good; he didn't play."
After the game, "he reminded us how much he appreciated each of us coming out and playing each and every week, and that's how he was—he always verbalized his appreciation."
Kasperski laughed when reflecting on fond Paradise-related memories, including his incredibly loud snoring as they roomed together during out-of-state tournaments. "He was a great roommate, but he'd wake up the next room with that snoring," Kasperski said, laughing. Plus, he always took Kasperski back on his team after Kasperski played a season with an opposing team. "He always convinced me to come back, and I always came back because he'd convince me what our softball league is about—winning was nice, but having fun and enjoying the [camaraderie with your] teammates you were with."
Paradise was scheduled to play this September with a master's division (age 50 and over) team (Chicago Gotcha Covered Legends) in the annual Gay Softball World Series in Dallas. "He was really, really looking forward to the Series," said Matt McGary, of Chicago, who is coaching the master's division team, which will wear patches on their uniforms in tribute to Paradise.
"It has been a tough week for our CMSA family. We lost two members, [Rob Paradise and Veronica 'Ro' Gazzillo (nee Soper)], very unexpectedly. Our thoughts and prayers go out to their families, friends and teammates," said CMSA president Michael Erwin. "We are a very strong organization that takes care of our own, so I am confident that together we will get through both losses. Veronica and Rob were both very passionate about the sports they were involved in and their commitment to CMSA will never be forgotten."
CMSA has made grief counselors available to those who need assistance getting through this difficult time.
Paradise's passing has led to a flood of social media support for the longtime softballer.
"No matter how hard it might have been to field a team when I played with him my last years in Chicago ... he never gave up," Tim Worthington wrote on Facebook. "He lived and breathed softball all year round. He truly will be missed as one of the nicest guys on and off the field. RIP my friend."
Jeff Weber wrote on Facebook, "Thanks Rob for your many years of dedication to the world of CMSA Softball—but more importantly, thank you for being you: a class act and a kind soul. Everyone will miss that one-of-a-kind voice on the field. May you find the 10 best players in heaven to coach."
Sebastian Contreras Jr., said he was "dumbfounded and speechless" upon hearing of Paradise's passing. "You were a sweet heart here on Earth ... and they apparently needed another sweet heart in heaven. Rest in peace, my friend," Contreras wrote on Facebook.
Paradise's final posting on Facebook was, fittingly, softball-related. He posted a banner congratulating the championship team of his division.
Joe Green of Chicago is one of those championship members from the C1 division this season. He replied to Paradise that his "passion for softball and the friends [he's] made throughout the years is demonstrated in [his] final post. We are your family, your friends, your brothers and your sisters. You were our coach, teammate, friend and part of our family. You will be missed."
"We are truly saddened to hear about the passing of Rob," said CMSA board member—and softball player Michael O. Rice II. "Rob always brought a great attitude to the fields each week. If you ask anybody [who] has had an opportunity to play on one of his teams, as I have, [they] would tell you that he was an all-around great guy [who] loved the game of softball.
"While he wanted to win, he was most concerned that everyone was having a fun time. He was a loyal friend and someone [who] could always be counted on. CMSA and the softball fields will not be the same without him. He clearly was the epitome of the phrase, 'Come out and Play.'"
Kevin Ball, who plays and umpires in the CMSA softball league, said Paradise was "an excellent person." He added that Paradise was "a loyal teammate, a great friend, someone who made me smile. He was great at accepting a person for who they are, and helping them if needed. He treated me with such kindness … a kindness that will be sorely missed. I'm so sad that I'll never see him on a ball field again."
Jeff Milio, 47, of Chicago, played with and against Paradise for 15 years—and Paradise was the first guy Milio played softball with when he came into the league. Paradise also went to Milio's home for Christmas several times.
"Rob was a great friend, person and mentor to not only all of us he touched in the softball community, but [he] also dedicated his life to teaching and his kids. These are inner-city kids with very limited opportunity in life, [yet] he devoted his life to making sure they had those opportunities to succeed," Milio said.
Milio reflected on the time he was on a flight, heading to Fort Lauderdale to play in a softball tournament—and Paradise was grading papers. Paradise turned to Milio and said, "Jeff, this is what I love; I'm so proud of my kids; they are all scoring in the 90 percent of their math tests. At the start of the school year they hated math, now look them.'"
"To me, that's what Rob was all about," Milio said. "He cared about people, had a great way with people and always made [others] feel included and that they were important; he was kind and gentle."
Milio added, "He was always ready to greet you with a smile, a hug … ask how you were doing. He was genuinely interested in you. I just saw him Sunday and was greeted with that big smile and hug. He created a sense of family. I loved him like a brother and have many funny memories. I was lucky to be in his life and share those experiences with him.
"Softball was his life. He loved the game, the competition. But what Rob really loved most was, the people, his teammates, even the other teams we played against. I don't think I ever heard him talk badly about someone. For all of us who were in his life, we are better people because of him. He will be truly missed, I can't imagine playing softball or even talking about softball without him."
McGary, 44, played on Paradise's team for the past three seasons, and tagged him as "genuine, super sweet, someone who would do anything for you, and probably one of the most selfless individuals I have ever come across."
McGary added, "Even though we did not have a very good season this year, winning only one game, we never got down on each other and always looked forward to playing as a team and having fun—and I think we can attribute that to Rob almost exclusively."
