Zach Wahls went from Iowan teenager to YouTube sensation in early 2011 after giving a simple but powerful speech to the Iowa House Judiciary Committee in favor of marriage equality.
Although surprised by his sudden fame, Wahls gamely embraced the subsequent opportunities, such as consulting for civil-rights organizations and eventually writing My Two Moms with Bruce Littlefield. Just in time for Mother's Day, My Two Moms tells stories from Wahls' life, as well as the lives of his moms, Terry and Jackie, in their journey as a family.
Perhaps the most widely known child of same-sex parents in the country, Walhs' story is thoughtful and compelling. Last week, he took some time to talk with Windy City Times about My Two Moms,; his position in relation to LGBT activism; and how he hopes to convey the love and values he learned, growing up in a household headed by a strong, same-sex couple.
Windy City Times: How has the reception to My Two Moms been so far?
Zach Wahls: It's been overwhelmingly positive. The book is selling incredibly well; I've gotten some really great reviews. Actually, we got an amazing endorsement from Jon Stewart, who hosts The Daily Show. Just earlier this week, he gave a really powerful endorsement and I talked to him backstage and he taken the time and he really read the book and it was incredible, pretty humbling experience.
WCT: Very nice. Reading this book, I noticed that at various different points in the story that it seemed to be targeted at very different audiences. I wondered if you could speak a little bit to who your intended audiences for the book were and who has been responding to it thus far?
ZW: There are definitely two target audiences: the first audience—and this is the reason I dedicated the book to my sister, both personally and also a little bit more metaphorically to other kids— [ is those ] who you know have an LGBT parent or parents. I'm trying to speak to them and share my own story.
I'm also trying to answer a lot of the questions for that second audience, those people who are on the fence. [ It's about those ] who say, "It's a free country and maybe these people should be able to live their lives, but how does that affect the kids? Should they be able to be parents—what is that going to do?" And I think in the book these are things that I question, in a powerful way.
WCT: A friend who read this book after I had read it for the review described it as meat-and-potatoes gay activism, which I actually thought was a pretty apt description, because I think you're in a really great position to own your Iowan-ness, your American-ness, your gay moms, just all of that. I'm really curious as to how you see yourself as personally positioned to help the LGBTQ-rights movement in America and where you're going to go with that.
ZW: I mean, Thomas, I think it's important to be clear that I'm not a spokesperson for [ LGBT ] people. I'm speaking mostly to the experience that I've had growing up and a little bit more broadly to the experience that other kids gay or straight have growing up with LGBT parents.
I do not consider myself a spokesperson for the movement or anything like that—just a kid from Iowa who had a speech go viral on the Internet. I'm a passionate believer and will defend those rights if it's important for me to do so, but as far me actually representing the actual LGBT community itself as somebody who is not LGBT-identified; I'm certainly in no position to do that myself.
WCT: That's very thoughtful of you. Nonetheless, the LGBTQ movement, since the beginning, has needed really strong allies, so I think that in telling your moms' story you're in a unique position to be a very effective ally.
ZW: There's a fine line, an interesting dichotomy really, on that front. I'm in this weird position where I'm not LGBT-identified myself, but in some ways—and this is contradictory to what I just said—I do feel I'm part of the LGBT community insofar as I was born into this, too. I didn't choose to have lesbian mothers, and issues that affect LGBT people affect me in a very intimate way. I'm in a position where I feel like I'm not an ally, in my mind, but I'm not actually LGBT. So I am a part of the community, but I speak specifically to the children of LGBT people, or of the community.
WCT: And how do Jackie and Terry feel about the work you're doing now?
ZW: I think they're both incredibly proud is really the overwhelming emotion. It's funny, they laugh and joke that they're more than happy for me to come home once a week for dinner, never mind writing a book.
WCT: And what you said about dedicating the book to your sister and, more broadly, children of other gay parents: What, in brief, would be your message to them?
ZW: Good question, Thomas. I think the overwhelming message I'm trying to send is twofold. One, to explain the various messages that are out there. You're alright, you're fine. This may sound like something you don't need to hear, but you're told so many times by people that you aren't OK and they just presume away your normalcy and that will have an effect on you. It's something most of us are already aware of, but it bears repeating.
The second point is that it gets better. Even though it's a message that we've heard a lot in the past year and a half we still are in a place it can be repeated. In a very real sense, I think the book is a reminder of things we know are true already but I think that as a peer, as opposed to an adult or parental figure, the message has a little bit more weight to that audience in particular.
And to the audience that might be on the fence, my message is that love is love. My hope would be that by showing that the values we hold, responsibility, love, are similar, we can start to build that bridge and really them understand the perhaps, despite some of the surface aesthetic differences, that at the end of the day we are more alike than we are different.
More information about Zach Wahls and My Two Moms can be found at www.zachwahls.com .
BOOK REVIEW Gay-rights activist Zach Wahls writes compelling memoir
In early 2011, Zach Wahls' testimony in front of the Iowa House Judiciary Committee about why his moms should be able to be married made its way onto computer screens throughout the country. Thoughtful and articulate, Wahls was a perfect spokesperson for children of gay couples working to assert their love for their families. Since then, he has been busy with speaking engagements and consulting for various gay-rights groups in addition to being a college student.
Wahls' latest step in his mission to normalize gay families and gay marriage is publishing a memoir, My Two Moms: Lessons of Love, Strength, and What Makes a Family. With the help of Bruce Littlefield, Wahls weaves a story that is thoughtful mix of his family's personal experiences and general musings on LGBT rights.
It may seem, at first glance, that the memoirs of a 20-year-old would be a bit premature. Wahls surprises, though, delivering a remarkably engaging, moving story of his experiences, both normal and out of the ordinary. My Two Moms is perfectly timely and, because of his youth, Wahls is in a unique position to make a compelling case for gay families.
Wahls is in the first generation of children of gay parents who have seen legal recognition of their families become an issue of fiery national debate. Although he espouses a point of view many would consider radical, Wahls clearly and persuasively presents himself as normal, well adjusted; he is the a product of a family with distinctly American values, simply headed by two women. His reflections on his own coming of age experiences appeal to both emotion and logic. Of his own childhood, Wahls states that, "I was normal until society told me they didn't think I was normal."
Initially, Wahls' self presentation may seem like someone trying too hard to assimilate, not giving his moms enough credit for raising a remarkable person in sometimes difficult circumstances. Wahls addresses this directly, saying, "My moms' ... decision to foster values of acceptance and tolerance in my sister and me—were not rooted in the fact that they were both gay; they were rooted in the fact that they were both good people who had good influences in their own lives growing up." In essence, Wahls presents gay families as simply families that many people view as distinct because the parents are gay.
Wahls' ability to address multiple audiences in a seamless narrative is notable. He writes to many readers, sometimes speaking to a general audience, sometimes speaking to gay-rights supporters, sometimes directly addressing gay-rights opponents. Just in time for Mother's Day, Wahls' story is one of a family that is at once new and normal. My Two Moms gives us a compelling book that has something for all audiences. All things considered, any reader would be hard-pressed to deny that, if the outcome is any indication, his moms transcended normalcy and did an extraordinary job raising him.
My Two Moms is available in bookstores everywhere. More information about the book and its author can be found at www.zachwahls.com .
