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Billy Masters
by Billy Masters

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"And special thanks to Armie's wife, Elizabeth Chambers, who is here tonight, as well, who is as crucial to this process as anyone. And for letting me crawl all over your husband for two months. Thank you for that."—Timothée Chalamet fondly recalls filming Call Me by Your Name with Armie Hammer. It might be a nice touch if he thanked the person who supplied the produce. He was a real peach!

Did I write a column last week? Were the Golden Globes only a few days ago? Did I actually come home—drunk as a skunk—and bang out a column as the sun came up? Yes, yes, yes and YES! But, I must admit, it's all a blur. That's the only reason I have for forgetting to tell you something very important. The night before the Golden Globes, Miss Ross ( her close friends call her Diana ) showed up at The Abbey in West Hollywood. And this was not a walk-and-wave situation. No, no, no. She showed up, went to the dance floor, and boogie-oogie-oogied 'til she just couldn't boogie no more—and if she took a double dose of Boniva, that could mean a good 20 minutes! Looking decades younger than her 73-year-old self, she writhed and cavorted to her new single—actually a remix of her first number-one hit as a solo artist—"Ain't No Mountain High Enough." When the song was first released in 1970, I was still in diapers. Now that the song has once again hit the top of the Billboard Dance Charts, it's entirely possible Diana can say the same thing! You can see the video of her dancing on .

I have been betrayed by Ricky Martin—alas, not in a sexual way. There we were, together ( in a manner of speaking ) at the Golden Globes, and he didn't tell me he was a married man. How dare he! To add insult to injury, his betrayal happened less than 24 hours later. Oh, the shame and humiliation. He was on the red carpet for the premiere of FX's The Assassination of Gianni Versace when he told E!, "I can't introduce him as my fiance. I can't. He's my husband. He's my man. It still feels amazing." When pressed for details, Martin added, "We exchanged vows, and we've swear everything, and we've signed all the papers that we needed to sign, prenups and everything." Nothing says everlasting love quite like a prenup.

With the Olympics fast approaching, folks are on the lookout for our next gay icon. One of the people getting oodles of attention is skater Adam Rippon—who is abs-olutely adorable. He's also being called the first openly gay U.S. figure skater to ever qualify for the Olympics—the operative word being "openly" because ... well, you know. One reporter asked the fetching 28-year-old what it's like being a gay athlete. "It's exactly like being a straight athlete—only with better eyebrows." When asked about the possibility of visiting the White House, he said, "I don't think somebody like me would be welcome there. I know what it's like to go into a room and feel like you're not wanted." He then added, "If I talked to people the way that President Trump talks to people, my mom would kick my ass." Perhaps she should visit the White House!

Days ago, Johnathon Schaech announced that he had been sexually molested by director Franco Zeffirelli while making the 1993 film Sparrow. First, who saw Sparrow? Hands? OK, moving on. What had Johnathon Schaech done before Sparrow? Anything? So, an unknown model ( and a stunning one at that ) is cast by a director widely known for sleeping with virtually every hot guy he encounters. After lots of innuendos and propositioning, Schaech claims that one night, Zeffirelli was very drunk and got the key to his ( Schaech's ) hotel room.

It is beyond the confines of this column to dissect this moment by moment, except to mention that's a lot of activity for 30 seconds! Zeffirelli's ( adopted ) son stated that this lurid tale is news to him. He said Schaech has regularly been in touch with the family, often texting inquiring about the 94-year-old director's health.

In our first Ask Billy question of the year, Stephen from Chicago is looking forward and backward: "With American Idol returning, I was wondering about Spencer Lloyd. He was gorgeous. What happened to him?"

I have worked with many "Idol" alums around the country, and I have never heard the name Spencer Lloyd before. There's a good reason for that. He was a contestant on season 13—the year after Mariah and Minaj. So, like most of America, I wasn't watching. That said, Spencer was one of the hottest contestants—something noted by judge Jennifer Lopez, who immediately labeled him "pretty guy." The "pretty guy" parlayed his brief stint on "AI" into a successful modeling career and works with the famed Wilhelmina agency. Needless to say, he is most often shot in various forms of undress. But why, oh why, is it always the devout Christian ones who take videos pleasuring themselves? While most sites have removed the footage, the pious can find it on .

When we're willing to fall on our knees before a false Idol, it's definitely time to end yet another column. Those of you in Chicago can see Spencer Lloyd in the flesh since he's a trainer at Barry's Bootcamp in Lincoln Park and River North. For those of you looking for something a bit closer to home, go to, the site that's only a click away. You can send your questions to and I promise to get back to you before I climb all over Johnathon Schaech at next year's Golden Globes—as if he'll be invited! So, until next time, remember: One man's filth is another man's bible.

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Billy Masters 2018-02-14 - "Unless it's changed overnight, the motto of the Olympics, since 1894, has been 'Faster, Higher, Stronger.' It appears the US Olympic Committee would ...

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Billy Masters 2018-02-07 - "We've only got five hits, so we have to fill in the blanks somehow."—Chynna Phillips, explaining the covers performed during a recent Wilson ...

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Billy Masters 2018-01-31 - "This is a détente, ladies and gentlemen."—Patti LuPone's first words on the mike when she showed up to rehearse the tribute to Andrew ...

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Billy Masters 2018-01-24 - "My father sees one color—green. That is all he cares about."—Eric Trump defends his father against cries of racism. It's hard to make ...

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Joffrey's 'Modern Masters' Feb. 7-18 2018-01-17 - The Joffrey Ballet presents Modern Masters—a mixed repertory program showcasing works by contemporary icons along with top emerging choreographers—Feb. 7-18 at the Auditorium ...

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Joffrey Ballet to offer Modern Masters of dance premieres Feb. 7 through 18 2018-01-11 - ( January 11—CHICAGO, IL ) — For its annual winter engagement, The Joffrey Ballet presents Modern Masters, a mixed repertory program showcasing works ...

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Billy Masters 2018-01-10 - "Get ready for some pounding. Some of us could see 8 inches or more. That's too much—even for me."—Virginia Beach weatherman Blaine Stewart ...

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Billy Masters 2018-01-03 - Billy Masters "I just want to take a sip of tea, if they'll let me—they told me there would be tea. Oh, ...

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Billy Masters 2017-12-27 - "And now we go back to Chris Cuomo. He's on the docks and taking quite a pounding!"—Anderson Cooper tossing it back to Cuomo ...


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