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Billy Masters
by Billy Masters
2014-01-29

This article shared 4683 times since Wed Jan 29, 2014
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"My son is being raised by two gay men. A lot of people don't know that. Evan is at home in Chicago, and I've had two gay men raising him. And they are the most wonderful men and I couldn't be more proud for him to see that."—Jenny McCarthy tells the world about what great surrogate parents her gay friends are to her son in Chicago when she's filming The View in NYC.

It may be early in 2014, but I'd like to remind you of a prediction I made in my year-end column for 2013. This was directed at readers who feel like same-sex marriage isn't moving fast enough. ( Those of us over 35 are able to recognize how swiftly things are changing. ) Back then, I predicted that gay marriage would be a federal law within five years. Shortly after that prediction, two more states crept to the brink of legalizing it, and another is about to join them. Equality Florida announced that SIX same-sex couples are filing a lawsuit against the state, claiming that being unable to legally marry violates the Constitution "by denying them the legal protections and equal dignity that having the freedom to marry provides."

You wanna get my attention? Write a story about a hot boy being condemned for having sex online, throw in an inaccurate headline, and I'm hooked. I don't know who published this piece, but the headline said, "Students rally around 18-year-old Florida high schooler failed for doing gay porn." This article further explained that once knowledge of the boy's porn activities reached the school administrators, he was suspended, "causing him to fail his high school diploma." Is it possible to fail one's diploma? You may fail a class, thus not receiving a diploma. But, of course, I'm splitting hairs. Let's get to the meat ( so to speak ) of the story.

Since the lad has identified himself, I feel completely comfortable sharing his deets with you. Robert Marucci is a senior at Cocoa High School. He claims to have started doing porn to help support his family. He started making videos in September online under the name "Noel II"—he wasn't even the First Noel! Some students found out and, as you'd expect, they told two friends, and they told two friends, and so on, and so on ( this is from a commercial that was big in the Captain & Tennille days ).

Allegedly, some students were teasing and bullying him and when the school administration got wind of the situation, he was expelled for "unspecified conduct violations." If there was bullying, it paled in comparison to the outcry upon his expulsion. A large percentage of students staged a protest—both at the school and on their Facebook profiles. The school explained that they had to investigate the situation and were now happy—virtually giddy—to welcome Robert back to school.

It might sound like all's well that ends well, but that's never enough for moi. I had to do my own full investigation. Of the five videos of Robert/Noel II, I've noticed a trend. First, they are all condom-free. And he shows amazing versatility—he'll get fucked lying on his back, lying on his stomach, sitting on the dick and, on at least one occasion, by more than one man. While I commend his mom for standing by him and telling reporters, "I'm proud of my son," has she seen the videos? Is she really proud of him? OK, he looks good ( far better out of clothes than in ), but is no one teaching safe sex anymore? Is it really not a big deal? Troublesome.

Less troublesome ( but still upsetting ) is the situation over at Lifetime. Allegedly, the network providing television for women ( and gay men ) will not be asking the Charmed One to return as host of Project Runway: All-Stars. While Alyssa Milano's uncomfortable and stilted delivery was widely acknowledged, there are rumblings that she was even more difficult behind the scenes—which is surprising because I've always found her to be an absolute delight. I'll have to get an unbiased opinion and ring up Shannon Doherty.

That loud yawn you heard Jan. 19 were oodles of gay men ( and some others ) watching the premiere of Looking on HBO. Truly, there was nothing really bad about the show. It just was so boring—I couldn't believe it was only 30 minutes. By comparison, Lincoln FLEW by! And, I'm sorry, but never has being gay looked so dull. Even the cast of Oz looked like they were having more fun. I'm told that subsequent shows will get better, and certainly there is a precedent for a weak pilot kicking off a great show. But if this is the one episode they spent the most time writing and filming, then I'm gonna need to re-up my Adderal prescription to get through it.

Our "Ask Billy" question this week comes from Victor in Mississippi: "Have you been watching this season of 'Splash!' from the UK? Who is Dan Osborne? He's GORGEOUS! They say he's a reality star, but I've never heard of him. He looked like he was really packed into that leopard Speedo—even Tom Daley was staring at it!"

Ah, yes, Splash!—the UK show that spawned a dreadful domestic edition. Of course, we didn't have the lovely Tom Daley coaching the "stars." And therein lies the other difference—the Brits get a gorgeous reality star, we got Louie Anderson. Dan Osborne is on The Only Way Is Essex, a UK show termed as "an award-winning scripted reality show"—which means it's like most reality shows here that don't admit to being scripted. ( It's often compared to Jersey Shore and The Hills. ) Dan is a 6'5", 22-year-old model ( lots of undie campaigns ) and friends with most of the people on his reality show. I guess he's like The Situation, but with a three-digit IQ! And, yes, he's quite gorgeous. Straight, has a kid with his ex-girlfriend, loves gay people. When asked about the leopard Speedo, he said, "I didn't choose them trunks, no. At first I was like, 'No way, that's not happening. And in the end, I ended up wearing them. After 'Splash!', I'm keeping them. I'm going to wear them on my next holiday—I'm taking them to Dubai with me." Right there you see yet another difference—would Sitch know where Dubai is? If you think Dan looked hot in his Speedo, you should see him out of them—as we'll show you on BillyMasters.com .

When boys are making a splash in and out of their Speedos, it's definitely time to end yet another column. For all your gossip needs, check out www.BillyMasters.com—the site that knows where to find the boys and the booze. If you have a question, dash it off to Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before Gunn shows Milano who's the boss. So, until next time, remember, one man's filth is another man's bible.


This article shared 4683 times since Wed Jan 29, 2014
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