Former Major League Baseball player Billy Bean will be on hand at Chicago's 34th annual pride parade. Bean, the grand marshal of
the Chicago parade, is in town to promote his new book Going the Other Way: Lessons from a Life in and out of Major-League
Baseball, about his life in and out of the closet as well.
Although no major league ballplayers have come out of the closet while still in the game, Bean says he hopes some current and
former players will. Bean started his career with the Detroit Tigers and played for the Los Angeles Dodgers and San Diego Padres as
well. In his book, Bean recounts his life from childhood until now. He talks of his five-year heterosexual marriage and of his nine-year
relationship with his partner, Sam, who died of AIDS. Bean now lives with his partner of eight years, Efrain Veiga. While Bean lived a
straight life for more years than he's lived as a gay man, he says he rejects the notion that people may consider him bisexual. 'I
functioned perfectly well with women sexually, but I am not a bisexual. I'm a gay man. That's my emotion. That's my biology. That's
where I feel like I was meant to be. Just because you can function physically with something … I don't think that makes you one thing
or another,' he said.
Following is an edited transcript of a recent interview.
Windy City Times: Your first experience in seeing gay people, really, was when you were on the Toledo Mud Hens where on a
road game you saw your first pride parade.
Billy Bean: I was in Provincetown in 1987 and the majority of people that had assembled there for that parade, it was in June, they
were located in our hotel. The parade was a Saturday afternoon and my game happened to be at the same time. But what it was for
me, it was the first time that I had ever, at the age of 22 or 23, had been around a group of gay[s] and lesbians who were there to
display their pride and be proud and represent our community, which was something I had never ever experienced. I didn't even
know they had that kind of thing. It was very naïve of me at the time. But I was so intrigued by it, and I admired the people to have the
guts to be who they are. You know, I heard comments from my teammates like, 'I'm locking the doors tonight, all these homos in the
hotel.' And for me, I didn't think that way. I didn't say anything because I felt like it would draw attention to me. But it was the first time—
the first image in my memory of that complete thought in my presence.
WCT: You're going to be in Chicago promoting the book and you're also going to be the Grand Marshal of the Chicago Pride
Parade. So you're in your own pride parade. How does that feel?
BB: Well, I think it's just a perfect example of you never really know how your life is going to turn out. I'm thrilled to be invited.
[Pride Director] Rich Pfeiffer has put together a great thing and I've heard so many great stories from my friends and people I've met
around the country talking about that. So I think it's going to be a brand new great experience for me. I'm running in a 10K with a
group of the people there so I'm looking forward to that. And you know, just really getting out there and expressing my gratitude to the
people for receiving the book. I hope people will be interested in that. I've worked very hard and I think it's a very important message
to our community. But not only to our community, but to the family and friends and the people we love because that's really the type of
market I wrote the book for.
WCT: And how are you feeling today— just overall?
BB: I feel great, you know? My life is busy. I travel a lot. I've had a very, very long, but successful and very gratifying book tour. My
publisher has been very good to me in getting me out there. And the feedback—my favorite part is meeting people person to person
because I really feel the reward coming back from people who are sharing their story with me. And it's just great to know there are so
many of us out there who have gone through many similar things. Sometimes great, sometimes very, very hard. But together, and
working together as a team—it's hard not to use sports metaphors —in that light, there's so much that can be accomplished. And I feel
the whole disposition of my life, living openly and honestly, and then hopefully being a proper role model to a lot of people in our
community, I take great responsibility with that and great pride in that as well. I'm really grateful for this time in my life. I don't know if
it'll always be that way. And I hope there are many many more athletes that come forward very soon, but right now I'm thrilled with it
all.
WCT: You just celebrated your 39th birthday, how was that kinda different from 10 years ago—say 29th or 30th birthday?
BB: Well, I think it's much different. For the first time in my life I have a family of friends. I have a great partner—Efrain is his name.
I've been with him for eight and a half years now. But what I've been able to do over the last three or four years now in Miami is open
up my heart. You know, just to be able to celebrate with the friends that I have made who accept me for all of me, whatever—gay or
straight—or whatever it is. And I never allowed myself to have that before. And I just feel that it's really the difference in everything in
my life. My family lives on the West Coast in California so I only get to see them probably two or three times a year. But the family I
built in Miami Beach, to have my birthday with them, I feel very very lucky. I really do.
WCT: Talking about your mom—your mother, Linda—you dedicated the book to her.
BB: Right. My mom was amazing. She was like my friend growing up. She had me when she was 18 years old. And I think the
most amazing thing that she ever said to me was when I told her that I was gay, after 10 years of struggling with that, she said, 'It hurts
me more that you didn't have the confidence to tell me something that was so important in your life, than the fact that you're gay or
you're straight.' And I learned a lesson that day. And from that day forward I kept her in my life close to me. And I just wanted her to
know that the journey that I speak of and write about in the book was a scary and lonely one at many times because I did not share
anything with her. And I did it because I didn't want to let her down. And she proved to me that there was no way I could let her down,
especially just by telling the truth about myself. So, I just think that there are some examples to be learned by the book. And that's that
so many of us use our family as a last resort for people to lean on when we're in times that are tough. And I learned from experience,
first hand, that my family was there for me. I know all of us haven't had that situation. But even if just relying on a friend or a relative or
a brother or sister, you can get through a lot of things a lot easier than if you try to hold it all inside and do it all alone.
Bean will sign Going the Other Way (Avalon, $23.95) at Borders, 2817 N. Clark, on Saturday, June 28 at 2 p.m. He'll lead the parade
on Sunday, June 29 at noon. www.BillyBean.com
