Soodek, Cardona and Saks (from left)._____________
When Monday morning rolls around and your colleagues gather around a table, chomping on chewy doughnuts to elevate their blood sugar level before beginning work, they chat about what happened over the weekend. The question comes to you. You casually mention that you and your partner attended a benefit for a queer-related organization on Friday, and saw a new film on Saturday. And suddenly, there it is—you've outed yourself in the workplace! No more hiding what you did over the weekend or acting like your social life is non-existent. Being out in the workplace means never lying about who you are and who you love. Unfortunately, being out is a bonus that many gays and lesbians are still fighting to obtain.
Until recently, it has been nearly impossible for many gays and lesbians to be out in the workplace or to obtain benefits. Reports from the Human Rights Campaign show that many U.S. companies are expanding their benefits for LGBT people, but still there is not 100 percent equality. Through telephone and e-mail interviews, Windy City Times spoke with three prominent Chicago lesbians in the non-profit and legal workplaces regarding their personal experiences being out in the workplace and where they think the workplace is headed. These women are:
—Evette Cardona, an openly lesbian Latina and founder of Amigas Latinas, a safe space for LBQ Latinas; and current Senior Program Officer at the Polk Bros. Foundation;
—Jane M. Saks, a lesbian, philanthropist, cultural leader, community activist, poet and current Executive Director at Columbia College's Institute for the Study of Women and Gender in the Arts and Media; and
—Coco Soodek, a lesbian lawyer who is active in the LGBT, political and philanthropic communities. Currently a partner at Bryan Cave LLC, she is also active in many civic organizations, including memberships on both the Midwest Board of the Weitzmann Institute and Stonewall Democrats Illinois.
Windy City Times: Do you see a distinction between the public and the private, and do you believe that being out at work is an activist act?
Evette Cardona: I see both. I see a distinction between public and private meaning people should be given their privacy when it comes to their lives—what I do in my bedroom is nothing for you to discriminate, regulate or legislate against. However, when it comes to LGBT individuals who choose to be out and vocal about their lives—talking about what they did with their partner on the weekend or pointing out how a company's health insurance doesn't cover same-sex couples—society wishes we'd 'stop bringing it up all time.' In that sense, the private is public.
Coco Soodek: I think that the best thing that LGBT people can do is to discuss our families as families, not as secrets that we pick and choose [ to whom ] we disclose. The more people see us, looking upon our families and talking about our families and treating our families as families, the more they'll accept that we have the freedom and the ability to define our families.
Jane M. Saks: 'Living authentically'—which is what I call it—is always an activist act. I was raised to believe that the work I do in the world, who I am in the world and how I live in the world are inextricably linked. My commitment to that belief demands that I try to be as authentic as possible in my life.
Many LGBT people live in unsafe environments, where equality is not present and seems impossible. I believe that those of us who have the luxury to live and work in environments where transformation and equity are possible, have an obligation to be out. I believe being out is an individual decision and has to be weighed against concerns with discrimination and one's own desires to live an authentic life, and the larger issues of becoming a co-conspirator in homophobic behavior and environments.
WCT: When did you first come out in the workplace and to whom?
EC: It took me a long time to come out to anyone, period! I finally came out to my family ( some, not all ) , my friends, the community, around age 30 but I didn't come out at work until my current job, which was five years later. I regret not being out when I worked with teenage mothers at Christopher House—an experience that transformed my life. At that time I didn't know how to balance being lesbian and just doing my job. I was afraid the young moms and especially agency staff would think I was promoting the lifestyle or recruiting the moms. I really regret staying somewhat closeted since I could have been an example or role model for those moms who may have been dealing with their own identity issues.
CS: September 7, 1998. It was the first day I had lunch with my new boss, David Guin, who taught me everything in the law. He is an openly gay corporate lawyer and one of the finest lawyers that I have ever known. At our first lunch, I sensed he was gay because he had pink bangs even though he was in a partner. And then I disclosed—that was the first time. And, [ of course, ] he was gay and became my mentor.
JMS: I decided just to be myself and to be honest. I did not have a plan or a step-by-step strategy. For me, I offer personal information as I think appropriate—as anyone would do in a professional setting. However, if there are assumptions being made that are untrue—such as that I am straight or that I agree with certain homophobic opinions—then I feel a responsibility to insinuate the truth, my opinions and represent my community and myself in a right way.
WCT: Where do you see the workplace headed in terms of being out?
EC: Out people in the workplace are demanding—they want equal protection, policies, domestic partnership, and health insurance that covers their partner. It's not unusual for a corporation to have the GLBT affinity group, and that helps to give a public face to a gay employee as well as a space for gay employees to go to for networking, information, and recognition.
JMS: My great hope is for improvement, of course, and that more people will feel freer and freer to come 'OUT' in all areas of their life because it will be safer and more equitable to do so. The more people who choose to come out, the more the world we live in will truly reflect our society and population. We all know that one cannot have a healthy, productive, equitable and evolving society when parts of the population are forced to remain invisible and unrecognized. We know this and it is not acceptable. Current statistics show things are improving in terms of policies—state-by-state and city-by-city. And, I am also hopeful that we are creating transformative movements for change. It is slow and often painful, but with some successes.
WCT: How do you think the legal workplace has been changing for LGBT people?
CS: In Chicago I think the legal workplace has been changing because of people like Gail Morse, Bob Ollis, and Michael Cook—all firm lawyers who are fully out in the workplace. They led us all [ and ] stood up without apology. They didn't announce anything—they were just themselves, and they showed us that it's much better just to be ourselves. It's changing because of people like them.
